Thursday, July 2, 2015

A clean slate

So I feel like I haven't been doing a very good job of keeping my resolution of writing a blog post for every week of the year. I want to get back to blogging a little bit, so here's what's been going on with me lately.

#1 - This last Tuesday I went to a group workout session with my dad and sister. It was outdoors in a park really close by us, and there were about 50-60 people there with us. We exercised for about an hour, and it was surprisingly a lot of fun! I've never been a big fan of exercise, but while I was quite exhausted, my body felt alive! Muscles I don't normally use are being put to work! That feels really good. ^_^

So I went to the other session again today. They do it Tuesdays and Thursdays, and I'm thinking I would like to make this a regular thing. I may already be pretty skinny and healthy, but maybe I can give myself some muscles or abs or something. :P

#2 - In the last few days, I feel like I have become something of a rising YouTube star. A couple weeks ago, while my boyfriend was out working at his job, I kept myself busy by recording myself as I reacted to the newest string of Steven Universe episodes, a mini-marathon, if you will. So finally, after editing my videos together with the actual episodes, I'm putting them up on YouTube, one episode a day.

I've posted 3 episodes out of 5 so far, and already I've gotten lots of views in a very quick time! I didn't publicize it or share that I'd done this with anybody, so I guess lots of random people are choosing to watch me as I watch Steven Universe. Which is incredible, because I don't think my videos are even that great quality! ^_^ It's just so awesome! I've even got people subscribing to me, and a couple comments here and there.

I'll post another one tomorrow and the last one on July 4th, and that will be the last "Steven Universe" video I'll post for a while, because there's no new episodes until the next big marathon in a couple weeks. I'd like to do something similar when that time comes, film myself watching these episodes for the first time. It's just really fun to think that I have an actual audience. ^_^

Here's my channel, if you'd like to check my videos out and see the nice things people are saying. ^,^

#3 - Yesterday I started reading this amazing book called "Second Chance", by Robert Kiyosaki. If you've never heard of him, Kiyosaki wrote "Rich Dad Poor Dad" and invented this financial education board game called Cashflow that my family used to play all the time, and he's one of my dad's (and in turn, one of my) heroes. In this book, he dedicates it to one of my dad's other heroes, R. Buckminster Fuller, who was basically the Leonardo DaVinci of the twentieth century, really smart guy with lots of great inventions and ideas.

So Kiyosaki talks about how Fuller's different philosophies changed his life, and how the country (and really the entire world) is having a whole financial crisis, and it all starts with how people are educated about money. When you really think about it, there isn't any good financial education in schools, so most people don't know how to get rich, so he's all about making humanity as a whole richer. I'm only on the fifth chapter so far, but I seriously think this book should be a must-read for the people of my generation.
So yeah, those were the top 3 things I wanted to bring up. I hope I get to blog a little more in this second half of the year (2015 is already half gone! Noooooo!!!) and that I keep on improving myself a little every day.
~Bettina out~

PS: yes, I'm posting this late at night. I really need to improve my sleeping habits... Or I'll just become a vampire girl. *in-joke!* *wink-wink* ^,~

Wednesday, May 6, 2015

The Lonely Tree

Once upon a time on a starry night
There stood a tree that was quite a sight
It was rooted in a valley by a silvery pond
Surrounded by mountains from dusk 'til dawn

It's trunk was rough, it's branches were bare
It was strong and tall, but felt lonely there
The only living thing for miles around
The tree grew sad that the only sounds
It could hear were the rippling pond and the wind
Little did it know that new life would begin

For on that very night, for whatever reason
Birds migrated to that valley. Perhaps it was the season?
2 birds came and perched on that lonely tree
The tree was so excited it could barely breathe
One bird was yellow, the other one pink
They saw each other and they each began to sing
They sang of lovely clouds and what it was to fly
Their song was so beautiful, the tree could only sigh
The singing birds grew closer, continuing their tune
By the end they were side-by-side, gazing at the moon

The lonely tree was deeply moved by this touching scene
It began remembering olden days, when it was young and green
Even when the birds flew off, the tree was still content
It kept their song in its heart and was never lonely again.
This painting I copied around October 2014. Obviously I took plenty of artistic liberties with my version.  More wavy water, bigger mountains, starry night, the little birds. ^,^ Hope you like the poem.

Tuesday, May 5, 2015

Blues, Greens, and Aquamarines

Blues, greens, aquamarines,
Of rippling reflections.
It's hard to reflect properly,
When the weeping willow hangs so heavily.

Lily pads sprouting pink and yellow flowers
Make me stare at this pretty pond for hours.
I try to get past the surface, to the murky depths below,
But the refracting light blinds me, the foggy waters have nothing to show.

Then I spot a little ladybug buzzing,
Touching down
On a small green pad.
It had to be tired of flying.

I wondered how far it had traveled,
How far it still had to go.
This was only one of the stops
On the spotted beetle's journey.

Soon it will take off again,
And forget this lonely place
Of placid languishing and wishing.

I don't believe I'll stay here long.
Like water, I want to flow like a song.
I can't be stagnant, that feels wrong.

Thinking fresher thoughts, I take my leave
Of these blues, greens, and aquamarines.
I copied this painting way back in February 2014 at an art class. The one at the top is my interpretation, and it hangs on the wall right next to my bed. This morning I was looking at it, and suddenly I got inspired to write a poem about it. ^,^

I've done a handful of other paintings in the past. Maybe I'll write poems based on those too...

Wednesday, April 22, 2015

Another diamond

Here's another poem that is in a similar format to the previous one, only longer. :P
1- It's
2- Not easy
3- To come up
4- With a good idea.
5- But who said it was?
6- No one becomes successful overnight, right?
7- It takes practice, and lots of work.
8- Making a song, writing a story, or inventing something
9- Is a wonderful dream for creative individuals to have.
10- That doesn't mean it's going to be fun and games.
11- It's hard to be original, not to mention challenging to compete
12- Especially with the many great minds that have all come before you.
13- With so much content out there, the garbage as well as the masterpieces,
14- Not to mention all the critics, trolls and haters, waiting to tear you down,
15- How does one even begin to express themselves in a way that's never been done?
15- Well, maybe you won't be completely original in your creative endeavors, but hey, it's okay.
14- After all, every new idea that came into reality was based on old ideas.
13- You can start being creative by taking existing things and changing them slightly,
12- Or even by taking a few things at once and combining them.
11- That's what all artists do, in the end. Real artists steal.
10- Changing something is much easier than creating from thin air.
9- There really is absolutely nothing new under the sun
8- When you sit down and think about it
7- But that is not a bad thing.
6- Stand on the shoulders of giants.
5- Can't promise you'll make it,
4- But you won't know
3- If you don't
2- Ever even
1- Try

A diamond poem

I decided to write a poem in an interesting format... Maybe I'll think of more...
1- I
2- Don't know
3- What I'm doing.
4- What's wrong with me?
5- I'm so lazy, directionless, bored,
6- Stuck in a block of creativity.
7- I need to be doing something else,
8- Something different and new with myself. But what?
9- How do I get myself to change my ways?
10- Somehow I must motivate and inspire myself, and get encouraged
10- To think outside the box and draw outside the lines,
9- Look at things from new perspectives and new angles.
8- At the same time, I need some order
7- Some rules with which to play by.
6- If only I had an idea
5- Of what I could do.
4- Where do I start?
3- I have to
2- make it
1- good.

Thursday, March 12, 2015

Crystal Gem rap battle

So I got inspired to write something today, thanks in part to the return of one of my favorite cartoon shows ever, "Steven Universe" (watch them all online here: and the following awesome rap battle videos:

I decided to put these two things together and come up with my own fictional character rap battle! Hope you like it. ^,^

Hello, I'm Garnet. I may not say much
But if you're a threat, I can pack a punch
I'm flaunting my gauntlets, better give up now or
You'll leave me no choice but to use my gem power
I'll pound you to the ground, knock you into next year
I protect my friends and I don't know fear
I'm fierce, I'm fast, you'll never know what hit ya
I've got a third eye that sees into the future
So I know how it goes, you lose and I win
This battle is over before it even begins.
Oh no, you didn't! There's something you missed!
When it comes to rap battles, the queen is Amethyst!
I'm messy, but you don't wanna mess with me
The best rhymes are mine, you just wait and see
I'm crazy, ladies! There is no escape!
I'm a wild child, honey, Imma whip you into shape!
This purple puma's on the prowl tonight
Don't tease me 'bout my height because I'll put up a fight
I've got an appetite for food and fun
I think it's clear to see that this battle is done
Now wait just a minute, you take that back!
I didn't want to do this, but it's my turn to attack
I am Pearl, the girl who's gonna rock your world
With my smooth sword fighting and a ballerina twirl
I'm filled to the gills with skills you don't even know
But if you want to throw down then I'll give you a show
I'm slender, I'm sweet and I'm shaped like a fairy
Don't let my looks fool you, my moves are legendary!
Are you scared? I don't care, this is such a waste of time
It's clear to see I'm the one with the best rhymes
Not even! It's Steven who has the funky flow
You gems may be cool, but this is my show!
I may be just a kid, but I kid you not
Part human, part Crystal Gym, I think I've got a shot
I'm not much of a fighter, but when push comes to shove
You know I'll be there to protect the ones I love
It's very plain to see that I rule Beach City
I know everyone's name and I'm clever and witty
So bow down to me, cuz I'm the king of the verse
Better hand the crown over to Steven Universe!

Sunday, March 1, 2015

The (new!) Story of the Man Who Didn't Finish Anything

So I published a poem years ago that to some seemed a tad depressing. This weekend I rewrote it so that ending was a little happier, but the message is still the same. Hope you enjoy it! ^_^
(The asterisks * indicate where I wrote new lines.)

Original, from July 2010:

There once was a man by the name of Paul
who was wiry, skinny, and not that tall
(he'd never quite finished growing up, after all.)

As a kid he had habits that were not very good
Never finished his veggies, like good boys should

No one understood him, not even his folks
Never finished a sentence whenever he spoke
(which was a problem when he tried to tell jokes.)

He never finished school, because of his quirk
He never finished classes, or his homework

Paul never finished movies, or even one book
He'd start, but then never give another look
Maybe they weren't worth the effort it took?

Never once did he finish his chores
His parents worried more and more...

*They made him join a group called the P. A.
*Procrastinators Anonymous, a.k.a
*Unfortunately meetings were always delayed

*Paul couldn't see why everyone fussed
*He didn't finish his sandwich, leaving the crust

As an adult, he never finished one job
(which was to manufacture thingamabobs)
He was sadly replaced by a guy named Rob

"You never finish anything!"
Said his girlfriend, Sarah King

*Paul tried to deny it and start a fight
*But before he could finish, he knew she was right
*He thought about her words all through the night

*The very next day, he made a plan
*To finally become a finished man

*Paul promised Sarah that before too long
He would go and prove her wrong
(Who knew his feelings were even that strong?)

*He decided to go back and finish school
*So his girlfriend would know that he was no fool

*After a few years, he earned his degree
*His parents cheered and wept with glee
*Sarah was as proud of him as she could be

*He wanted to finish other things
*Paul decided to spread his wings

*He began to write his story, so he could share
*with the world how, with much work and care
*Anyone could do what he did, if they dared

*He's not finished yet, but he will be soon
*It's due to come out sometime in mid-June

So let this be a lesson to everyone:
Finish what you start.....

Wednesday, February 25, 2015

The World of Monopoly

I am very proud to say (especially after feeling the way I did in my last post) that I wrote a poem yesterday! Annette helped me a little bit, but I feel so good to have written something new!

I don't know how it came up, but while my family was having lunch, one of us were trying to remember all the spaces around the Monopoly board. We know all the color blocks (purple, grey-blue, magenta, orange, red, yellow, green and blue), but the individual names and locations of deeds and railroads and Chance/Community Chest was harder to recall.

So, for no reason at all, I decided to write a poem about it! I felt like giving it a somewhat Dr. Seuss tone and rhythm. I think this could make a really fun children's book someday, with colorful pictures and characters and everything!

Without further ado, here is my poem! XD
Do you want adventure? You want to have fun?
You want to learn something to impress everyone?
Well fly around the board and you will see
All the places to land in Monopoly

"Mediterranean Ave" is right after Go
Impossible to get on the first dice throw
Since of course you play with 2 dice, you know!
(In Britain however, it's Old Kent Road)

Afterwards, Community Chest
Then Baltic Ave (or Whitechapel) next
On Income Tax you must pay out
200 bucks or 10 percent your amount

First railroad is Reading, or Kings Cross
The train Harry takes to reach Hogwarts!
Oriental Ave or Angel Islington
Then comes Chance, you might just win

Vermont Ave or Euston Road, either one is fine
Connecticut Ave or Pentonville, suddenly you find
You've gone to jail! Tough luck, how sad. Oh wait, it's just a visit?
Continue on your merry way. That isn't so bad, is it?

Next St. Charles Place, also Pall Mall
Then Electric Company and that's not all
You see States Avenue (or Whitehall)
Having fun yet? I'm having a ball!

Virginia or Northumberland Ave
The last Magenta space you'll have
Pennsylvania Railroad or Mary-le-bone Station
Keep an eye out for your next destination

Which is St. James Place or Bow Street
Then Community Chest number 2, how neat
Tennessee Ave or Marlborough
Is the second orange place you'll go

New York Ave or a Street called Vine
Then Free Parking's next in line
Kentucky Ave (in Britain The Strand)
Chance is the very next place you'll land

Indiana Ave or Sweeney's Fleet Street
Red like the blood in Lovett's meat
Illinois Ave or Trafalgar Square
B&O Railroad (Fenchurch St. Station there)

Atlantic Avenue or Leicester Square
Two squares in a row? What a mighty fine pair
Next is Ventnor or Coventry Street
Turn on Waterworks if you can't stand the heat

Marvin Gardens or Piccadilly
The cop whistles stop. Oh come on, really?
I can't go to jail. I'm almost done
Alright, I'll let you off with a warning, son

Pacific Ave or Regent Street
North Carolina, (Oxford, sweet!)
Here's the last Community Chest
Quickly now let's finish the rest

Pennsylvania Ave or a street called Bond
Double-oh-7 urges you on
to Short Line Railroad or Liverpool Street
Buy all 4 stations and you can't be beat

Now's your last Chance to be a fat cat
Park Place or Park Lane is where it's at
Luxury Tax is a small price to pay there
If you can afford Boardwalk or Mayfair

Then you're back on Go where you began
Well what do you know? That sure was grand
So whether you're a dog, a shoe or a car
Or a ship or a hat, you'll go very far
Around that board again and again
Good luck kid, hope you win in the end!

Monday, February 23, 2015

I don't know what I'm doing

For the last few days, I have felt many things... Lost. Restless. Lazy. Wishful. Guilty. (All in no particular order.)

It's been too long since my last post, so here's what's been happening in my life:

On Valentine's Day, my mom got a call from Israel that my grandfather was in the hospital. Long story short, he fell to the floor, hit his head, and might have even injured his brain. I was shocked when I heard the news in the kitchen getting breakfast, but it was hard to feel very sad about it right then, because my boyfriend Jerome had stayed the night and was there, and it's hard for me to be sad about anything when he's around. ^_^ My brother and sister had their own plans during the weekend, so it wasn't until the next day that they heard the bad news.

So anyway, since then, I haven't been very motivated to do my normal website work with my dad and sister. Mostly because I know things are tough for my parents right now, and they aren't showing much motivation either. These are just strange times...

I feel like I'm just wasting time, though. I've been continuing my French studies with the Duolingo app (see my last post), which is steadily getting harder, but is still lots of fun. It's kind of addictive, actually. I have no real reason for learning the language. It's not like I'm scheduled to visit France any time soon. It's just because I can, and I like it. Still...

I've been reading a lot (I finished the first 3 books of the Crossfire series, and I'm excitedly awaiting the 4th from the library. I've continued reading bits of them Jerome, and the shared experience makes it so special to me), eating a lot (it was cold for a while, so my mom has been making lots of soups and pastas and stuff), spending lots of time on YouTube (even though I promised myself I would stop) and generally feeling like just a consumer and not a creator.

Meanwhile my sister Annette spent the last few days putting together a really funny video that combines "My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic" with the so-bad-it's-surprisingly-good movie "Kung-Pow: Enter the Fist", which you can see here.
Already it has nearly 300 views, because one of her friends linked to it in an MLP forum. I'm proud of her for making it, though I'm partly jealous of her for having something so creative to work on while I have nothing...

It just hit me hard this moment that I don't know what I'm doing. I really don't. I'm sure everyone has felt the same way at one time or another, but it's still a strange feeling...

I also realized something as I was walking with my dad this afternoon: In another couple of years, heck,  maybe even within one year, my family is eventually going to explode, scatter, break apart. Whether because my parents decide to split for whatever reason (things have been rocky for them sometimes), or Annette and I (or even Adam) finally move out of the house and start our own lives, the 5 of us aren't always going to be the tight unit we've always been known to be. We'll be forced to make our way through life as individuals...

I'm so used to the lifestyle I have now that it's hard to think about the life I really want for myself. I tell myself I want to be a writer, but I don't write nearly enough. Why don't I write? Because I've always had my website work as an excuse.

So what's my excuse now?

Tuesday, February 10, 2015

Started Duolingo

So a few cool things have happened since my last post. I finished the second season of Wander over Yonder and eagerly await the next season. I completed the anime Death Note with my boyfriend Jerome over the weekend, which was awesome, but a bit sad at the same time...

I have also started and finished reading the first book in the Crossfire series, "Bared to You". It's a similar type of story to the 50 Shades trilogy, but trust me when I say that this is INFINITELY BETTER! I actually read some of it with Jerome, and he enjoyed it as much as I did!

The great thing about this story is that all the characters are interesting and relatable. The woman (Eva) is no naive Mary Sue; she's been around the block, she has a strong personality and a past. The man (Gideon) may be devastatingly handsome, but he's human too; he messes up and has his flaws, and he acknowledges that and is willing to work on them! As a couple they have their problems, but they have, for the most part, a very healthy relationship. They communicate, they accept each other, they make changes for each other, and — of course — they have a banging sex life. XD

Anyway, totally looking forward to getting the next in the series. But the big thing I wanted to blog about is that I started a new program this week!
It's a language-learning game called Duolingo, and for the past 3 days, I have been picking up French. I am so excited, because I've always wanted to learn another language besides English, and now I've found an effective and genuinely fun way to do that! Also French happens to be the language Jerome is studying, so I thought it would be fun to see if I can catch up to him. ^,^

See how far I've gotten in the program already!
So far, as you can see, I've covered the basics, certain common phrases, different foods and animals! All the while I'm picking up on all the different little grammar rules and gender specific words. I'm learning how to read, write, translate and pronounce the language with all kinds of mini-games, and it's incredibly addictive! I just don't want to stop learning!
In this picture you can see that the next level for me is Adjectives, but because I've been getting so much XP in such a short time, I also picked up a bonus skill: flirting. ^_~ Ooh la la! Looking forward to getting those lessons!

It's kind of fitting that I'm starting to learn the "language of love", since Valentine's Day is almost upon us! ^_^ I hope who ever is reading this has a week full of love and happiness. Oh yeah, and you should totally try Duolingo out for yourself!

Tuesday, February 3, 2015

You have to suck before you succeed

It occurred to me that it's been quite a while since I last posted here. In keeping with my New Year resolution to write at least one post a week, I thought I'd come back and write what's been on my mind recently. ^_^

So this month I've started reading this book called "Launch", and it's really exciting. As the subtitle suggests, it's basically a manual on how to succeed with your internet business and make tons of money doing it. Annette and my dad are reading it too.

I'll admit, I'm usually pretty skeptical about get-rich-quick-scheme books, but this has some very good ideas and material in it, and while the stories may seem a bit unbelievable, they're inspirational and true.

In a nutshell, the idea is to build a big list of emails, give customers a taste of things to come, and then make a big deal about your launch. It's like how Hollywood releases awesome trailers of movies months before they hit the theaters, or how Apple makes announcements about their newest smart devices. You create a buzz, build up anticipation for whatever you're offering, and then you open up shop. The most important element here, it seems, is building a good email list, so you can talk to your customers and build a relationship with them.

I'm only on the fourth chapter so far, but I decided that I had to check out the author guy's website and find out more. So Annette and I did some research on Jeff Walker, checking out his blog and such, and my god, I think we have found ourselves a new hero!

If you were to go and check out his blog at, you'd find this sincere, smart, down-to-earth man from Colorado who has made it his mission to help entrepreneurs build successful businesses quickly and easily. He posts videos every week, and he talks in a really conversational way, with a big smile. Maybe he'll trip over some words on occasion, but he doesn't edit those parts out. He just speaks for 5, 6 minutes straight on whatever topic he has, in one take! Gotta give him some respect just for that!

I'm not sure why, but Jeff reminds me a bit of the author who got me interested blogging, James Dashner. If Dashner ever decided to take up video blogging, I imagine he'd pretty much be like this guy. ^,^

This book and the whole idea of building an email list couldn't have come at a better time. My dad, sister and I have been racking our heads on how best to release our websites to the public, and this seems to be something cool to work towards.

Also, if you'll remember, at the beginning of the year I made another resolution to talk to every one of my 115 Facebook friends. Guess what? I already accomplished that goal in the first week of January. I wrote every person I knew a personalized Happy New Year message, and I got roughly an 80-85% response rate! Just imagine... If that had been an email list rather than FB friends list, and I had been selling them something rather than wishing them a great 2015, I would have been raking it in! :P

And that is why I've decided to start collecting all the email addresses of our iPad contacts and putting them in a spreadsheet for future use. Maybe I'll go through my Gmail contacts next, and ask for the emails of anyone I'm missing from Facebook. In "Launch", there was a couple who got their business started purely from reaching out to their friends and family first, and they're living in France now! If it worked for them, it can work for me and my family too. So far I have about 50 emails, and I only got up to "J". I decided to do the rest tomorrow, and in the meantime tell you... whoever is reading this right now... about how excited I am about all this. ^_^

Oh, and the title of this post comes from something Annette said while we were on a walk this afternoon. We were saying how we could make it as big as Jeff Walker and the rest of them, and how everyone had to start at zero. She said something along the lines of, "I guess we all have to suck before we can succeed." I thought that was really true, and really funny! XD

So yeah, even if we make a few mistakes along the way, I'm sure someday we'll look back on all our hard work and experiences and laugh about them, clinking flutes of champagne from a fancy hotel in Italy or something. ^_~

If you're interested in any of this, I implore you to check "Launch" out of the library. Buy it, if you must. Just read it! Also check out Jeff Walker's website and blog, and I'm sure he'll become your hero too. ^,^

Tuesday, January 20, 2015

3 reviews in one post

So I wanted to talk about 3 shows I watched yesterday and my brief thoughts about each one. 2 of them were cartoons I saw for the first time ever and am pretty excited about, and the other one has already been a favorite show of mine for a long time.

First, let me talk about "Star vs. the Forces of Evil".
I saw both Episode 1, "Star Comes to Earth", and Episode 2, "Party with a Pony" in one video (because I guess they both came in a bundle.) With this as my first real impression of the show, I think I like it. It's not a show that's on the same level as say "Steven Universe", but it does have heart and shows a lot of effort put into the story and characters.
In the first episode we get the basic plot of the show, which went pretty much exactly how I predicted in a previous post here. Magical princess in another dimension gets powerful wand, her royal parents decide to send her over to Earth, yada yada yada. Princess Star is a good character. She's only 14, so that partly explains why she's so crazy and full of that manic energy and can't control her magic. I liked the boy Marco too. The voice could have been better cast, in my opinion, but being the "safest kid in school" is an interesting character trait, I guess. At first he and Star don't get along, but by the end of the episode they're pretty much friends.

The second ep introduces one of Star's friends from her old world, Princess Ponyhead. I feel really conflicted about this character, because on the one hand she has such an annoying voice, but on the other hand I kind of realize that she's supposed to be an annoying character, so her voice really fits... Anyway, Ponyhead takes Star and Marco dimension hopping with those special scissors shown in the intro, and it turns out she's jealous of Marco because he seems to have taken her place as Star's best friend. I've seen plenty of shows that have done the "jealous best friend" story before, but I liked how this show handled it.

The next show I saw was "Wander over Yonder, which is also a relatively new Disney Channel cartoon. My sister Annette turned me on to it and I watched the first 2 episodes with her, "The Greatest" and "The Egg".
The show is pretty zany and cool, and the design brings up memories of the Powderpuff Girls or The Rocky and Bullwinkle show. It's basically about this funny, laid back little alien guy named Wander and his tough horse friend Celia going on different adventures. Sometimes Wander comes up against his nemesis, Lord Hater (which is a great name because it's like Lord Vader!)

It doesn't matter where you put this guy, he's just happy-go-lucky and ready for anything. Kinda like when you could put the Looney Toons or Tom and Jerry into any place or situation. It just works! I also love that Wander's voice is done by Jack McBrayer, who is the most excellent choice for this kind of character.

The last show I saw yesterday was Glee, Season 6, episode 1, "Loser Like Me". I've been putting off watching the new season of Glee for a while now, partly because I've been so busy and partly because I thought maybe I could wait for the whole season to be over and just binge watch it later. But I broke down and decided to try the first episode out, just to see how it measured up to all the hype and rumors I'd heard.
It was interesting to come back to Glee after so long. As usual, some of the story was outlandish and totally unbelievable, but something made me overlook all that and suspend my belief. I guess I just watched this for the characters I love so much. I want to see them succeed and do great things.

It started off on a totally low note. Apparently Rachel's sitcom, That's So Rachel (which she abandoned her Broadway role in Funny Girl for) was branded the worst show in all of existence! (A bit overkill, much?) I liked how the pilot was played in the episode at some point and... Yeah, it was bad. :P Also super sad that Rachel's gay dads were getting divorced for seemingly no reason (except I guess they couldn't get Jeff Goldblum back to play the other dad.)
Also Sue Sylvester is her ridiculously evil self and has turned McKinley high into... A great school that has banned the arts and music? Okay, I'll buy it. She still manages to pull of the whole villain thing, which is awesome.

I was really surprised about the Kurt and Blaine situation, since just like Rachel's dad's they are broken up. ~,~  I've been shipping and rooting for Klaine right from the start, ever since they became a couple. I've just always loved the two of them together, and hoped that their love, of all the TV romances out there, would conquer all, so it saddens me that they fell apart. (And that Blaine's new boyfriend is Karofsky! XP No way!) Still, I'm glad that Kurt at least wants to win Blaine back, so I have some hope to get me through the season. 

So Will Schuester became a new father, and his little red-headed baby is so cute! He left McKinley and now coaches the other Glee club, Vocal Adrenaline (the one that is always the big competition to beat). Also Blaine has left New York to coach the Warblers (because the guidance counselor got Ebola or something? What?!) My absolute favorite part in the episode is when he and the Warblers sing Ed Sheeran's "Sing" together. I was dancing in my seat for the entire number!!! I just love their acapella voices and the way they move, it's so awesome! ^_^ 
So the episode closes out with Rachel and Kurt deciding to take on the evil Principal Sue and restore the New Directions Glee Club. It's gonna be tough, because they'll have to go against their friends clubs in the end... that will be hard to watch. :P I guess this is their final hurrah. Glee is throwing all they've got into this last season... I hope it's worth it in the end.

That's all for now. Thanks for reading. ^_^

Friday, January 16, 2015

That time of the month

A lot has been going on lately, making it kind of hard for me to blog. But I promised myself to write at least one post a week, so this will probably be a big, rant-y mish-mash of a post.
First of all, this might be t.m.i. (this is my blog though and I don't care who reads this, so anything goes), but I got my period a few days ago, and it was NOT fun. Usually my "time of the month" is entirely uneventful, but this time I got major cramps right away. It was like a tidal wave of pain that I'm not very used to. Had to spend most of the day in bed, tossing and turning and trying to make myself comfortable.

Well, at least I got much better after that day, and it feels like it's winding down now. It makes me appreciate all the times I'm normal and healthy. ^,^ Still, I worry that because it's that time of the month that I've been feeling... hormone-y. More emotional about things than usual, in other words. Normally I wouldn't whine or complain, or try to blame having feelings like that on my period, but I have a couple confessions of having such feelings to make.

One of these is that, since my boyfriend started classes again this week and I've gotten more busy in my own work with my family, we went a few nights this week without really talking to each other.

This may not sound like much, but Jerome and I have been going out an ENTIRE YEAR, and when we're not on dates with each other we've ALWAYS texted and/or web-cammed each other every night, at the least. So missing a night or two is a big deal! We saw each other on FaceTime the other day, but still. I've been missing my boyfriend (missing communicating with him, at the least), and it hurts just as much as having cramps does. >,<
What makes it worse is that my family and I were invited to a friend's wedding that takes place this Saturday, so I won't get to see Jerome over the whole weekend like I've gotten used to! I know I shouldn't be so whiny and be really grateful for all the time I have spent with my boyfriend, and anyway I'll simply see him next weekend. But again, this is my blog. I can be whiny if I want to. >_<

Jerome has been great about the whole thing, though. (I've probably been upset enough for the both of us. Lol) He misses me too, but realizes we're both busy, and he urges me to have fun at the wedding this weekend. He's going off-roading with his dad on Saturday anyway, so it works out great. So I feel much better about that. ^_^

The other feelings I want to confess to blaming on my hormones is something I'm a little more guilty about... I have to say it somewhere though. I need to get it off my chest, otherwise I'll just keep carrying it around with me like a heavy secret...

I don't want to name any names (if they read this, they'll know who they are anyway), but lately I've been feeling really mad at a certain friend of mine. He never has time to talk to me anymore, and I'm tired of trying to get him to share anything with me. I always used to email him when I wanted to tell him something exciting that was happening in my life, begging him to do the same, but his responses have become so rare that I've gradually stopped writing to him myself. That makes me really sad, since we've always been such close, long-time friends...

Anyway, recently I discovered that I still had something of his: a notebook he'd shared with me. He sent it to me for my birthday last year. I'd held onto it for months already. It was about time I gave it back to him, since it was his and I'd finished reading it long ago.
Yesterday I mailed it off at the UPS store. It's headed on its way back to the rightful owner as I type this. I included a letter with the notebook, though. And I said some things... that I'm worried will be hurtful to my friend. I meant them when I wrote those words, though... Basically I questioned whether we were really friends anymore, and I refuse to speak to him again until he can show me he still cares about me.

I intend to keep that promise I made to myself... A part of me just hopes my friend won't be too mad at me, and realize that while my frustration is real, a part of it came from me being a tad over-emotional when I wrote those things... So please, when you read this... forgive me. Okay?
In entirely OTHER news!
I recently finished reading Robert Galbraith's (a.k.a., J.K. Rowling's) book "The Silkworm", sequel to "The Cuckoo's Calling", which I read over a month ago. I think I liked the sequel better than the original, since while the first one was about the "suicide" of a famous model, this mystery followed the case of a missing, later found gruesomely murdered author. Examining suspects found in the literary world held my interest a lot more than the world of celebrities and fashion. I wonder if Rowling will write any more Cormoran Strike novels?

Once again, I wrote down all the character descriptions I found in the book, but I'm not going to bore you with them. I'm not even sure if I want to keep doing it, because it's quite a tiring exercise, and turns what could have been a quick read in a week into a book taking me multiple weeks to finish.
I also saw the movie Birdman in the theater with my family recently. That was such an unexpectedly AWESOME film! I absoluetely loved it. ^_^ I loved how the whole movie appeared to be one enormous shot, no takes or edits whatsoever. I loved how the opening and ending credits appeared in a unique and interesting way. I loved the drum music in the background. I loved how Michael Keaton's character talked to himself and did telekinesis and even FLEW, and you knew that all these things were really happening in his head, but it looked cool. I also loved Edward Norton. His character is something of a jerk, but he looks like Jerome, so I like him. ^,^

Another few things I saw that I'm really excited about is the 2 new episodes of Steven Universe!

#36 Warp Tour: Where Steven discovers that he and the Gems aren't the only ones using the warp streams (their mode of transportation between other Gem dimensions) and that there's another Gem person out there trying to fix the warp pads. Apparently Garnet and the others don't want other Gems around, because that's bad, so they destroy the big main warp pad??? This raised a lot of questions for me, but I liked it.

#37 Alone Together: Steven practices dancing with the Gems in order to achieve fusion with them (combining bodies and powers to make one being). This doesn't work out, so he hangs out with his friend Connie. (I totally ship Steven and Connie! Then again, how can you not? ^,^) He teaches her how to dance a bit, and they have so much fun and are so in synch with each other that they actually fuse together and make... STEVONNIE!
Oh my god, Annette and I flipped out over this character. Before Garnet gave them the name Stevonnie, we thought they would be called Con-even, because we were both like, "I can't even!!!" XD I mean, just look at that sexy character design!

So yeah, hi-jinks ensue. They have fun with their new combined form, they make both male and female workers at the donut shop have a crush on them (well, is Stevonnie a guy or a girl? No one can tell!) and then they go a rave dance party, because hey, he/she looks big enough to be a teenager.

I've seen a lot of good S.U. episodes, but that episode has got to be my absolute favorite so far! XD It was clever, it was funny, it was new... It just made me super freaking happy.
Okay, last thing I'll mention in this post is that I've become addicted to a new app game called "
2 Cars" (Thank you, Pewdiepie! XP) It's really fun, and so hard to stop playing! I blame it on the cool music, and  the way the sound effects seem to synchronize with the beat. I have a record of 46 points so far. I think if I can just manage to break 50 points, I'll delete the app...

So that's all I have to talk about. Congratulations on making it to the end. Next time I promise not to be quite all over the place...

Edit: I made it to 69 points in 2 Cars! Just like I promised, the app is off our iPod Touch. I'll miss that game, but I don't think I could have done much better than that. ^,^

Thursday, January 8, 2015

Don't mention it

So I did what I said I was going to do! I actually went and wrote an L x Light fan fiction story! I am so proud of myself. ^___^ Took me quite a few days to write it all. I didn't go as far into the story as I'd originally intended, but I'm tired now and I feel like I ended it in the right spot anyway. Whoever is reading this, I hope you like the pictures I've included in the story. ^,~

I dedicate this story to my boyfriend, Jerome, in honor of our first anniversary coming up this weekend. He's the one I started watching Death Note with and encouraged me to write this fan fiction when I came up with the idea in the first place.

This is for you, my love. <3
   It was quiet that evening, walking through the empty halls of the headquarters for the Kira case. I didn't know where my father, Matsuda or any of the other officers in the investigation were, but that didn't matter. I enjoy walking by myself.
  I was particularly enjoying it, because it had been so long since I'd even had the ability to be alone with my thoughts for one minute.
  Ever since picking up the Death Note, Ryuk, the Shinigami who had dropped it in the human world, had followed my every step, watching my every move. He wasn't that bad, really, but feeling yourself being watched all the time could become a bit of a nuisance. Then later, after I gave up the notebook and all my memories of it, and Misa and I were eventually set free from our confinement, that damn jerk Ryuzaki (he'd told me that he was L, but told everyone to call him by that name) had insisted on having me and him chained together with handcuffs, since he still suspected me of being Kira and wanted to keep an eye on me.
  He may have been a lot less ugly than Ryuk, but it was still much more annoying to be physically tethered to this guy all the time. He was always there! When I was working, when I had supervised dates with Misa, even when I had to use the freaking bathroom! Thankfully the chain was long enough that he could be on the other side of the door while I did my business, but come on! He couldn't take the cuffs off me for just a few minutes? At least Ryuk was respectful enough to give me my space.
  Going to bed at night while chained to him was the worst. I could hardly get any sleep, knowing that bastard was probably perched on his own bed like a giant owl, watching me the entire night to make sure I didn't do anything suspicious. I was lucky not to get dark bags under my eyes like L had, his own eyes gray, sunken and nearly dead inside.
  But thankfully, that's no longer the case. We caught the new Kira, Higuchi of the Yotsuba Group. L trusts me now, so I'm completely free of those cursed handcuffs. Most importantly, I have a Death Note again. Oh, how I'd missed all that power!
  Everything went exactly as I had planned it.
  I've practically won.
  The best part is that I'm totally alone to enjoy this victory. No Ryuk hovering over me, at least for now. He must be watching over Misa at this moment, since she now has possession of the Death Note that belonged to him. And no L...
  Actually, for some reason I can't help but wonder...
  Where is L?

  Something told my feet to take me to the very top of the building, where I realized it was raining incredibly hard. I walked out onto the roof, where the sound of water falling was almost deafening compared to the quiet inside. 
  Just then, I thought I saw a gray slouched figure in the distance, standing alone in the storm near a giant satellite. The thick shroud of rain made it difficult for me to see, but I could still tell who it was even from a distance. It was unmistakably L, with his baggy blue pants and the white long-sleeved shirt he always wore. I wondered how long he'd been standing out there. He looked entirely soaked, his long jet black hair nearly covering his face. He seemed to be staring out at something far away.
  As if he sensed that someone else was present, he turned his head towards me and we made eye contact.
  We stared at each other for maybe a minute, but he didn't make any move to get out of the rain.
  What could he possibly be playing at, doing something like this? What was his game? Sometimes I felt like I could never understand this guy.
  "What are you doing standing out there by yourself?" I asked him.
  L didn't answer me, instead putting his hand to his ear as if to say "come again?".
  Well, who could hear anything over this storm? Still, slightly annoyed, I repeated myself. "What are you doing standing out there by yourself?"
  He kept his hand on his ear and leaned in more, signaling that he still hadn't heard me over the noise of the pounding rainfall. I thought I could see the hint of a mischievous grin on his face.
  I growled under my breath. This guy was just impossible. What, did he seriously want me to go out into the rain with him? Was that it? L had always annoyed me to a certain degree, but this pissed me off!
  I knew I could very well have just walked away and not been bothered with any of this. That would have been the smart thing to do. But I had to know what L was doing out there.
  Taking a deep breath, I dove into the storm. The wind was really fierce, icy raindrops pelting on me and all around me. I was instantly drenched, and already I began to regret my decision.
  Even so, I walked slowly and calmly, trying to appear as if the rain didn't bother me, just like L was doing.
  It was always a contest with him and me, ever since we'd first become aware of each other. Who was the more clever one? Who could stay a few steps ahead without the other one ever realizing it? Who was going to catch whom first?
  As Kira, the true Kira, I was determined to win.
  As soon as I get the chance, I'm gonna kill L.
  "What are you doing Ryuzaki?" Light asked when he reached the satellite.
  Interesting. He still used the name I told him and the others to call me by and not L, even when we're in private company.
  I avoided his gaze, staring at the ground. "Oh, I'm not doing anything in particular. It's just..." I paused, thinking... no, knowing I'd heard something. I looked up at the sky, where the sound seemed to be coming from. "I hear the bell."
  "The bell?" asked Light, confused.
  "Yes. The sound of bells has been unusually loud today."
  "Hmm. I don't hear anything."
  "Really. You can't hear it? It's been ringing nonstop all day. I find it very distracting."
  It was true. I'd heard the terrible ringing in my ears ever since I'd gotten up that morning. It gave me a really bad feeling in the pit of my stomach... Or maybe that was the sweets finally getting to me?
  No, I knew I'd felt this feeling somewhere before. But where?
  "I wonder if it's a church. Maybe a wedding, or perhaps a..."
  My mind was suddenly awash with memories I'd tried my hardest to repress. I remembered hearing bells the day my parents had died. It was when I was at school, right before the accident. I'd been hearing a ringing in my head all day, but no one believed me. Not the other students, not the teacher, not anyone.
  The call later came to the school from Watari, an old friend of the family. He pulled me out of class for the day (in fact, he was eventually able to pull me out of that school entirely after pulling some strings) and took me aside, explaining to me what had happened.
  It was a strange feeling. I was sad, but I wasn't surprised. Something in me had already known, after all.
  I didn't shed any tears that day. It would have been natural for me to cry at a time like that, completely understandable, but I've never been the crying type. I wasn't trying to keep from crying though. I just literally couldn't.
  All I remembered next was standing outside the fence of my parents' graves in the snow, holding Watari's hand. He'd turned to me and said, "Don't worry, I'll take care of you now. Any time you need me, whatever you require of me, I'll be here for you." I'd gripped his gloved hand tighter when he said that.
  For the longest time, Watari had been my only friend in the world. But now...
  "What are you getting at, Ryuzaki?" asked Light, interrupting my train of thought. Without even waiting for an answer, he said "Come on, cut it out, let's go back inside."
  I turned and looked at Light Yagami. He looked impatient with me. Well, after all, we were standing in a storm that didn't feel like it would let up anytime soon. He wouldn't be standing out here if it weren't for me.
  On the other hand, I feel like I need to take advantage of the fact that Light is still here and that we're completely alone. I need to figure something out, before he leaves...
  Or perhaps, before I leave...
  "I'm sorry," I finally replied to him. "Nothing I say makes any sense anyway. If I were you, I wouldn't believe any of it."
  I frowned in puzzlement, looking at L. What was going on in that weird, allegedly brilliant mind of his? Had he really been trying to tell me something important and blowing it off now, or was he just talking crazy? Was he trying to confuse me on purpose?
  We shared a few moments of relative silence as the rain pounded all around.
  Finally I realized I was thinking much too hard about this. Maybe we were done with playing games. I scoffed and gave him a small wistful smile.
  "You know, you're totally right. Honestly, most of the things you say sounds like complete nonsense. There'd be no end to my troubles if I actually took you seriously all the time. I probably know that better than anyone."
  "Yes. I would say that's a fair assessment. But... I could say the same about you."
  That one took me by surprise. Immediately I got defensive. "What's that supposed to mean?"
  "Tell me Light. From the moment you were born, has there ever been a point where you actually told the truth?"
  It seemed like the sound of the raging storm had suddenly disappeared, like ear plugs had been abruptly inserted in my ears, and all was absolute silence in my mind. L was giving me this darkly serious look, staring at me like he'd never done before.
  Damn it! How could he still be suspicious of me? Did he still think I was Kira?
  Or could this be about something else entirely?
  Something tickled at the very back of my mind. Maybe there was a tiny, long forgotten secret I was keeping, even from myself...
  I squelched the thought as soon as it popped up. Now was not the time. I had to give him an extremely careful answer.
  "Where's this coming from, Ryuzaki?"
  I have to play innocent. But not too innocent...
  "I do admit, I stretch the truth here and there. However, find me one person in this world who's never had to tell a lie, and it wouldn't be easy. Human beings just aren't made to be perfect like that. Everybody lies from time to time... Even so, I've always made a conscious effort to be careful not to tell a lie if it could hurt others.
  "That's my answer," I finished, hoping it sounded genuine enough.
  L listened to my speech all the way through, staring at me unblinkingly the entire time. At first, he didn't seem like he believed I was telling the truth, but then he turned his head slowly, appearing to accept my response as being honest. "I had a feeling you'd say something like that".
  Something was strange about his expression. Was that... disappointment in his eyes? Had I said the wrong thing to him?
  More deafening silence.
  "Let's go back inside." L finally suggested. "We're both drenched."
  Well, finally you have a sensible idea, I thought. "Yeah," I said in agreement.
  The two of us came out of the rain and took off our shoes and socks, which were soaked all the way through. Our clothes clung to our bodies, and the air conditioning made it feel even more freezing than it was outside. We found some small towels in the bathroom to dry ourselves off.
  Light left the bathroom ahead of me without saying a word. I stayed behind to wring out my shirt and stare at myself in the mirror.
  Well, that certainly could have gone a lot better, I thought to myself as I squeezed the twisted fabric and let rain water pour out into the sink.
  Before Light had answered my question, I had noticed something in his eyes. Something close to a flicker of panic. Something that told me all I needed to know.
  I knew L was lying. Not just to me, but to himself.
  Ever since I'd first laid eyes on Light Yagami, I was drawn to him. Of course, he was my main suspect of being Kira and my first exposure to him was through the surveillance cameras bugged throughout Chief Yagami's house. But even with all my suspicions, I was attracted to his handsome looks, his high intelligence, his calm and impenetrable manner. I'd yearned to know how exactly this genius highschool student was able to remotely kill criminals so effortlessly, but besides that, I just wanted to meet Light. Get to know him better.
  I finally got my chance to meet him in person on his first day of college. Though I'm sure he did his best not to show it, right away I knew he was scared of me. Well, that was probably because I revealed who I was to him and my suspicions of him being Kira. He always tried to keep his distance from me after that.
  I like to believe we warmed up to each other somewhat, playing a friendly game of tennis and going out for dinner together. Regrettably, our time together was fraught with constant tension, each of us trying to stay one step ahead of the other. We were both the hunter and the hunted. We could have been good friends, with all the things we had in common with each other, but the fact remained that I was L, Light was (highly possibly) Kira, and one of us was eventually going to catch the other first. I couldn't allow myself to get too attached to him.
  Miss Misa Amane threw a big wrench into the works. Not only when she came out as (possibly) being a second, more powerful Kira, but when I learned she was Light's girlfriend. I was disheartened for a time, until I met Misa myself and saw how she and Light interacted with each other. She was obviously head over heels in love with him, but he didn't seem to return any of her affections. He actually seemed quite alarmed when she had appeared out of the blue while Light and I were taking a stroll together. One might even say, embarrassed? I concluded that he was just using her and keeping her for appearances only.
  Poor girl. She could do much better. Actually, a part of me was attracted to her as well as Light, but we couldn't be more different. I couldn't possibly keep up with someone with her energy and personality. (I wondered who possibly could.)
  I remembered when I had gotten both Misa Amane and Light captive. In Light's case, his captivity was entirely voluntary. (He brought about the possibility that he might have been controlled by Kira to kill all those people.) I watched the two Kiras day and night through the cameras in their cells. Light's father, the chief of the Japanese Police, demanded to be locked up as well, in solidarity with his son.
  Several days into their confinement, something changed. The killings started happening again, and Light started making a ruckus, claiming that he absolutely was not Kira, that his imprisonment was a big mistake. Something in the desperate urge in his voice forced me to believe he was telling the truth.
  I didn't want to believe that all my hard work in hunting Kira had been a giant waste. Maybe keeping the two of them locked up for 50 days was a bit excessive, but I had to make sure. The other officers weren't happy with me about my decision, least of all the chief.
  I couldn't properly explain to myself why or how, but ever since that moment, Light seemed to have transformed into quite a different person. He was still wary and careful around me, but he seemed more genuine, more honest, more... good. He was thoughtful and selfless, and even became more patient and caring about Misa. He also made it his mission to help me catch the real Kira, which pleased me a lot. I could use a bright mind like his on the team.
  Of course, I couldn't shake my suspicions of him still potentially being Kira, so I had us handcuffed together. A somewhat extreme measure, perhaps, but it was the only way I could be sure he wasn't up to anything.
  Mainly though, the cuffs were there for my own selfish reasons. It allowed me to always be with him, to get closer with him. It allowed us to bond like never before, hunting down Kira literally side by side. We may have had our fights (a couple of times, things got physical), but there could be no denying that we worked brilliantly together.
  Done drying my clothes out to the best of my ability, I slid my shirt back over my head, the fabric now only slightly damp.
  I won't go so far as to say those were the happiest days of my life. I try not to let my emotions run away from me. Still, I got an unreasonable amount of enjoyment out of that time in which we did everything together. Working, planning, eating. (Well, I suppose I did most of the eating. I always offered my little cakes and chocolates to the others, but they never accepted). I particularly liked watching Light sleep. He seemed at his most innocent and peaceful. A face like that couldn't possibly do any wrong or kill people... Could he?
  I rested my hands on the sink and sighed, making a small patch of fog appear on the bathroom mirror, and closed my eyes, full of pain and regret. Ever since we'd caught the new Kira, Kyosuke Higuchi, and discovered that the weapon he used to kill criminals was a little black book called the Death Note, a tool belonging to the Shinigami (death gods), Light had changed again. I felt it deeply, and it worried me.
  Maybe it had been a mistake to let him see the notebook. It did something to him. Something bad. The Light I had gotten to know over the past few weeks was, in all likelihood, gone.
  My eyes snapped open, and I gave my reflection a hard look.
  No. It's not over until it's over.
  I left the bathroom with a towel on my hair. I felt the power of the air conditioning again. I hadn't realized just how warm the bathroom had been until I left it.
  I found Light sitting on the stairs. He was still in the process of drying himself, rubbing a towel on his neck.
  "Well, that certainly was an unpleasant outing," I said, approaching him. I was referring more to my exit of the bathroom than to our somewhat foolish time standing in the rain, though he didn't know that.
  "It's your own fault. I mean, what did you expect?" Light's eyes were closed as he ran the towel through his bright orange hair.
  I gazed at his broad shoulders, the contours of his back and arm muscles just visible through his damp shirt. From the side, I could see the top 2 buttons of his shirt were undone, revealing a smooth neck and a toned, bare chest.
  "You're right. Sorry," I said in a quiet, distracted voice.
  I looked at him in an almost hungry way.
  Perhaps Light was Kira, and had always been Kira from the beginning. Or perhaps the power of Kira would transfer to another person, since Higuchi was no longer alive. In any case, I knew Kira had it in for me, so I didn't know how long I had to live.
  Might as well enjoy the time I still have.
  "Hmm," I said, getting an idea. I took the towel off my head and walked even closer to Light.
  I finished drying my hair enough that the tiny drops of water stopped dripping and rolling down my neck. I hated that feeling.
  I sensed movement on the stairs below me, so I opened my eyes.
  Right as I did so, L grabbed hold of my right foot.
  I gasped in shock, nearly freaking out inside. I wasn't used to my feet being touched like that. "W-what are you doing?!"
  How the hell had he gotten there without me hearing him? What was he, some kind of ninja?
  "I thought I might help you out," replied L, calm as you please. "You were busy wiping yourself off anyway."
  Help me out? We were L and Kira, sworn enemies! Why would he want to help me out?
  "Look, it's fine. You don't have to do that."
  "I can give you a massage as well." What?! "It's the least I can do to atone for my sins. I'm actually pretty good at this."
  Was this guy being serious right now? Atone for his sins? What on earth was L going to gain from giving me a foot massage? I was going to flat out refuse, insist that I could wipe my own feet, thank you.
  I looked at his eyes, though. They weren't dark and serious, like they usually were, but wide and gray, bright and hopeful. He genuinely looked like he wanted to be helpful.
  It was a strange look. Something about it reminded me of how Misa looked at me sometimes.
  "Fine, do what you want," I said finally. I looked away, trying to act like I didn't care one way or the other what he did to my feet.
  Slowly, carefully, L put the pure white towel to the sole of my foot. It was soft and fluffy. Maybe this wouldn't be so bad after all...
  Unexpectedly, I felt my ankle twist in a forceful movement.
  "Hey!" I protested.
  "You'll get used to it," was his response.
  "Hmph." If you ruin this foot rub, L, I really am gonna kill you.
  Surprisingly though, that was the only time his massage hurt me. I supposed he had just been trying to get my foot into a better position. He stroked the bottom of my foot with the towel, starting from the heel and going ever so slowly across the instep and to my toes.
  He wasn't rough and quick about it either, like I might have expected. His touch was gentle, but firm. He really wanted to take his time with this. In spite of myself, I didn't mind that.
  I looked down at L, his dark head bent downward, black hair hanging like a curtain in front of his face, focused intently on his work. I noticed how wrinkly his shirt was, how it was still slightly damp. I noticed how the back of the shirt clung to his thin frame. How the hell did he stay so thin when he ate so many sweets all the time?
  I suddenly felt something cold and wet drip onto the foot L was massaging. I looked and saw tiny beads of water falling down from the tips of L's long, dripping hair. He hadn't done a very thorough job of drying himself.
  I picked up the towel I'd set aside earlier and reached out to dry his hair with it. "Here, you're still soaked."
  The edge of the towel brushed L's cheek, and he glanced up at me for a moment.
  His eyes... They looked like they were shining. Like pretty stars.
  He looked down at my feet then, realizing that he'd accidentally been dripping on me. "I'm sorry." He wiped the water away from my foot, rubbing the top part of it now.
  "Don't worry about it," I said.
  This should make us equal, shouldn't it? I wipe his hair while he wipes my feet. I'm just returning the favor, I thought to myself.
  Silently we worked on each other with our towels in the quiet, empty hall at the top of a staircase. I was once again grateful that the other cops were nowhere to be found at the moment, so no one could see us like this.
  Eventually L dropped his towel and started massaging me with his hands. Thin, pale fingers danced and pressed into my skin.
  He kneaded one of his thumbs into the muscle of my instep, and I groaned involuntarily. I stopped drying his hair.
  He looked up, raised an eyebrow at me, and dug into the same muscle. 
  I leaned back and set my hands on the floor, arms supporting the rest of my body. He started moving his thumb in little circles and I made a sharp intake of breath, trying my best not to tremble. He was hitting such an excellent spot.
  Even with hair draped over most of his face, I saw his mouth turn up into a satisfied smirk. "Told you I was good at this."
  I squeezed my eyes tight, suppressing a second moan of pleasure. He seemed to be enjoying this way too much. As a matter of the fact, I was enjoying myself way too much.
  Just when I thought it was going to be the end and I felt L place my right foot slowly down onto the stair, he grabbed my left ankle and started in on my other foot, doing the same thing! This time I didn't bother trying to hide my pleasure, making soft sighs and throwing my head slightly back. He nearly gave me goosebumps.
  No one had ever touched me like this before. Gently. Softly. Carressing. Squeezing. I lost myself to the sensation of it.
  To be honest... I wished it would last forever.
  "It'll be lonely, won't it?"
  "You and I will be parting ways soon."
  "Huh?" I came out of the haze I'd been in during the rest of the massage. I probably wasn't thinking entirely straight.
  L had suddenly stopping his rubbing, and was staring at me with dark and deathly serious eyes again.
  Lonely? Parting ways? What could L possibly mean?
  The ring of a cellphone punctured the silence, startling me. It was L's. He stood up and answered it, holding it with 2 fingers and slightly away from his ear while I remained sitting. I hadn't realized it before, but I'd always found the curious way he held things to be somewhat interesting.

  "Yes?" Silence as the other person on the line spoke to L. "I understand. I'm on my way."
  "Huh?" I asked as L put his phone back in his pocket.
  What was going on?
  "Come on. Let's go, Light. It seems like it's all worked out."
  Just like that, the moment between us was over, and it seemed to be back to business as usual. L walked away, heading down the hall to take the elevator rather than the stairs.
  I stood up, not moving too quickly. My head was still stuck in a strange, dizzy kind of haze. As I slowly followed behind him, I tried to identify what exactly I was feeling. It was difficult, because I didn't believe I'd felt anything quite like this in my life.
  I had let my guard completely down with him. The walls I'd built inside myself were crumbling in my mind. I'd done my best to push him away from me, to deny him entry into my thoughts. But after something like this... I couldn't just forget about it.
  Just as I reached L, the elevator dinged and the sleek silver doors parted. He stepped into the box, leaning with his back against the wall, and I came in after him, standing at his side.
  "Ground floor, please," he commanded; the elevators were all voice-activated. The doors slid themselves closed and I felt the rising feeling in my stomach as we sank quickly down.
  "R-Ryuzaki?" I hesitated. I didn't even know what I wanted to say to him.
  "Yes, Light?" he asked in a detached voice. He didn't even look at me.
  I frowned, steeling myself. I walked right in front of L... Ryuzaki... and put my hands on the wall, one on each side of his head. I towered over his slouched, slight figure.
  "Ryuzaki," I said in a more firm, more confidant tone, commanding his attention.
  Slowly he turned his head up at me now, and his curtain of black hair fell away from his face. He looked surprised, with the gray eyes of a deer in the headlights. "Yes?"
  I gazed deeply into his eyes, trying to figure him out. Trying to figure myself out.
  Finally I closed my eyes, giving up with a sigh. I leaned my head forward so that we ended up gently touching our foreheads to each other. "Thank you."
  I could hear the rattle of the elevator as it slowed down and began to approach our floor.
  "Don't mention it."